Touring Without Dennis
Written by Rik (The British Bulldog)
To the tune of Lights, written by Tommy Shaw
I know that Dennis can't tour
And Chuck is with us no more
But Glen is back and JY still remains
So we will still go on tour
Face all the critics once more
And we won't laugh at DeYoung’s aches and pains
Standing on stage on opening night
The lights won't make me break out in a rash
Just like my friend Dennis DeYoung
A doctor said to me
You should stop takin' the mic
He really is very sick
He must stay in the dark until we fix...
...this ailment he has acquired
I'll bet he's getting quite tired
Of hearing you and JY take the piss
Well thank you doctor but tonight
The lights will shine on me and Todd and Glen
And one big spot light for JY
I've got to laugh....I think it's funny
Give me bright lights
Burning lights
Glowing lights
Give me flourescents give me halogen
you can flash those beams all around, on the ground
I'm not a vampire so I don't care...In the light I'll stare
Give me more lights
Make em bright
I'm alright
Don't want no shadows, I want laser beams
Dennis will just have to stay home, all alone
I ain’t no gremlin so I just don't care....In the light I'll stare.
Interpretation
When word got out that Dennis DeYoung would not be touring in 1999 due to a mysterious illness that involved light sensitivity, there was a lot of anger and confusion on the part of many Styx fans because Styx would go on touring without one of its most popular members. Chuck's apparent retirement only added to the feelings. Many fans angrily blamed Tommy, as the original bearer of the news (a phenomenon as old and bizarre as humanity itself). This parody was written, tongue firmly planted in cheek, as if Tommy were thinking with elation about the coming tour.
Here's what Rik had to say about it: "Look, I'm sure Tommy and Dennis would see the funny side of it. (Hehe)"
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